Malaysian Christian Writes

I am at a bus stop Waiting for my transport to my next destination. Running in my mind all the preparations. Being all "calm" as I look at my watch and tap my feet Breathing heavily as I clench my fist Growling as I say "where is the bus?!" when it has only been 5 minutes. I am at a bus stop I come here every day, Going back and forth using the same way Sitting on a bench in heat at times in rain Frustrated by the inconvenience, circumstances and delays. Sitting down I start to pray, With an angry heart "God where is the bus?!" I say. I am at the bus stop In the end I have no choice but to wait The world does not revolve around me since GOOOOD is sovereign =/ Suddenly I heard it loud and clear, PAUSE...A voice I heard "Stay silent, stay still, and draw near" What do you mean?! It's hot, I'm sweating, looking at my watch I can't just be waiting. "PAUSE...and trust me, just look at what you're missing.

I cry Because as much as I seek happiness, it doesn't last long.  The moment I think of it, the emotion is gone.  Life never seem to go as expected with its ups and downs. Dreams seem to be shattered, where is my glory and crown? I believe I deserve certain things life for all the hard word I strive. They say that is life for you. Such an ignorant answer no matter how true. Because it does not seem to explain the void, being on this cruel earth, being toyed. (And then...) I cry Because my best efforts still can't seem to bring me where I desire Because I realize that as much as I try I will eventually fail.  When I am called to be the head I feel so much like a tail.  I succeed awhile only to fall. To fall short of it all. As much as I weigh the good it some how never covers up the bad.  God's standard is too high and mighty to ascribe to. I cannot possibly measure up.  Is this a trap? (And then...) I cry Because looking at the world a